Birthday always feel like a better opportunity for self improvement than the beginning of a new calendar year. I usually try to be a person with great New Year’s Resolutions. And it’s usually an epic fail. This year wasn’t as bad as usual but it still wasn’t the changes I thought I could make.
My heart just was not in it.
The New Year is just a time we expect that we should make changes. Because everyone else is doing it. Maybe it really is because we all want to be part of a culture of change. Or maybe it is because we want to connect with the people around us.
The big problem with making changes at the New Year is the group mentality. We aren’t making changes because the timing is right for our lives. We aren’t making changes because we have an overwhelming urge and need to change. We are trying to change because it is convenient. We are trying to change for the wrong reasons.
I turned 23 in 2005. I like to describe 23 as my scary age – you feel like you should know what you are doing with your life but in reality, you have absolutely no clue. 23 still scares me in ways that I’m told are similar to the ways my friends feel about 30 or 40.
But I don’t say that 2005 was my scary year. 2005 was just fine. It was me being 23 in the year 2005 that was the problem.
And I think 26 is going to be a pretty good age for me. I have a husband that I love and I adore. I have a home to live in. I have my friends and family. I have a job. I have things in my life that I am passionate and excited about doing. My needs are met and I want the things that I have.
I’m not emotionally attached to the calendar year I am living in but I am emotionally attached to the number of years I have under my belt. The process of turning 26 makes me want to make changes to make this year under my belt. I would rather say that I changed the world for the better when I was 26 years old than say “Dorie Morgan changed the world in 2008”. Or “Dorie changed the way she lived when she was 26” would be better as well.
What if we change the way we think about making resolutions to change? What if we picked one thing to change or accomplish every year? But instead of waiting for a universal start date, we use our birthdays. We make one change and we make that change in the form of a well developed plan.
Change rarely looks like a wish list. I may wish that I looked like Angelina Jolie, had the money of Oprah Winfrey and kept a house like Martha Stewart but none of that is realistic. Or probable. All that list contains is a series of wishes that are virtually unobtainable.
If I am serious about making a change, I need baby steps that lead to success.
I’m not sure what exactly I want for my 26th year but today is a really good day to actively think about it.
Deb said...
1Happy Birthday!!! I can tell you that 26 was a great year in my life…I can’t wait to see what it will bring for you.
I hope and pray that your year will be a truly blessed one - you’ve already been a blessing to me!
10/16/08 10:56 AM | Comment Link
SANDRA said...
2happy birthday to you…happy birthday to you…happy birthday dear dorieeeeeeeee….happy birthday to youuuuuuuu. xoxox~Sandra, Ger, & Cameron
10/16/08 12:16 PM | Comment Link
Carm said...
3Happy Birthday. I love the way you look at life, your own growth, and the way you interact and relate in teh world. No wonder I am so lucky to have you as a friend.
10/16/08 7:19 PM | Comment Link
Dorie said...
4Thanks for all of the birthday love! It makes me feel so spoiled in such a good way!
I am still amazed at the blessings I have in the form of amazing friends. Thanks for being part of the world I live in.
10/16/08 8:11 PM | Comment Link
SANDRA said...
5Well Dorie…you hold a special place in my heart…still remember those days after hoover, going to your grandparents house, eating oreos and playing outside. Or the days in your mom’s old townhouse, upstairs in our little classroom playing school.
Oh its almost halloween…ummm does your mom still have that freaky skull?!?! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! The memories
10/17/08 9:25 AM | Comment Link