June 23, 2011
Posted in: Baby
Remember in elementary school, probably somewhere around the 4th grade, when girls started getting pulled aside for “The Talk”? Puberty was rapidly approaching so there was this urgent need to prepare girls for the changes that were about to happen to their bodies. Of course we don’t tell these girls the reality of those changes. Instead we tell them that some wonderful changes are about to happen to their bodies and they might feel dramatic but its how they will become women, blah, blah, blah…
Please note we leave out the reality of bleeding from your vagina once a month until The Change happens (tampons are expensive). We also leave out the judgment that women will pass on other women based on the changes that happen to their bodies but that’s another story for another time.
This story is about how everyone lied to me about puberty. Four and a half years after I got The Talk, I finally got my period. Six years after that, I finally had enough breasts that I could buy a bra that fit but it was really just for show since I didn’t need it. The only thing that came in when it was supposed to: Hips. Like those are useful on a young woman with no other curves what so ever.
So after the disappointment that was puberty, I didn’t really believe the hype about pregnancy. Yes, I know, there is nothing more dramatic than a baby growing inside of a person but I was told in puberty changes were coming any day and none of the changes showed up until years had passed.
I had to buy maternity pants at 6 weeks. And by week 10, I went up two full cup sizes. I haven’t been able to see both feet at the same time while standing for about a month now. And I haven’t managed shoe laces in three weeks. FYI, I’m 22 weeks pregnant.
I keep hearing its going to get worse. I finally believe them.