On Monday through Friday, my husband wakes up and takes off his wedding band. It is as much apart of our routine as making dinner or visiting my grandparents. A new work day means that for the next eight to nine hours my husband takes off the visible symbol that he is mine and I am his.
For the vast majority of my husband’s time outside of the house, in a strange way, I do not exist. Women do not notice his wedding band because he does not wear it. And in an outsider’s perception, I only exist once I am mentioned.
Of course when he returns from work, his wedding band goes right back on his finger. Or at least right after he takes a shower. I do not doubt my husband’s dedication to our promise when the ring is on or off of his finger.
I find myself asking the question though – if a wedding band was not on my finger, would a stranger realize that I am married? If I did not wear my ring at work, would I feel less married? Does the ring make the marriage?
If the ring does not make the marriage, then my husband spent quite a bit of money on an engagement ring and wedding band that he did not need to.
In a strange way, a ring is almost like a human shield – the ring should be saying “your advances are not wanted”. But why do we need a little piece of metal to say that to others? Why are we not capable of saying it ourselves? Or maybe the ring is saying it to us, as in “their advances are not wanted”.
jrandom42 said...
1Some of us guy have no choice about taking off the ring when we go to work. Anyone who works with high voltage, rotating machinery, pneumatic tools and so on has to do this. It’s nothing against marriage and its symbols, but just a matter of practical safety.
I’ve seen too many guys who either get electrocuted through their rings or get fingers and hands torn off when it gets snagged by various tools. Either we take it off, return home with fewer parts than when we left, or we don’t come home at all. Since nearly all of us guys want to come home, we take it off when we leave and put it back on when we return.
05/8/08 11:58 AM | Comment Link